One of the most toxic things we can do to ourselves is to hold grudges or hold onto negative thoughts about or towards another person. We usually feel that we are somehow hurting that person who hurt us by spending a lot of time and attention in negative ways toward that person. Or sometimes, we just keep reliving the trauma or incident and being angry over and over again. Who does this really hurt? That person? No, they are usually off doing their own thing completely unaware of the stress and negativity you are under due to their actions.
The only person you are hurting is yourself. Wouldn’t you rather be free of that old issue, let it go, and move on with your life? Anger and hate are like a poison to our bodies, both physically and psychologically. When you are willing to forgive the other person for what they did, and truly let it go, ongoing health problems can magically disappear and you will often begin to feel better emotionally.
So, are you willing to let it go? Are you willing to forgive? Forgiveness is not condoning the actions of the person, it is merely saying “I know you were doing the best you could with the limited skills, knowledge and abilities you had, and I forgive you.” It doesn’t make it okay, but at least you don’t have to keep wasting your time, energy and thoughts on that person.
So go ahead and forgive them. Then forgive yourself, too, for whatever you need to be forgiven for. You are an amazing being and you deserve to have happiness and joy in your life.